Little Elm's things she knows for sure (at 4 years and 1 day / all answers spurted out of her mouth within 30 seconds)
~that we are going to buy her a box that she can put her little toys in (so her brother can not touch them) and she is going to paint it pink and purple and sparkles
~that she wants to learn how to draw a pony
~that she can eat like a grown up at a restaurant, sitting quiety and eating nicely (where on earth did that come from)
The things I know for sure*
~As much as I am sick of being on strike and not receiving a pay cheque, the positive outcomes so far have been meeting a bunch of really interesting people who are much more like me than I would have ever imagined, that I am in the great outdoors for 4 hours straight every day with a tan to prove it and of course I have more time with the kids than I usually do.
~That I love that my family calls and sings happy birthday to one another
~I am so excited for the new season of Parenthood to start tonight!
I had this idea for a weekly blog topic that just came to me the other day. I would blog about 'the things I know for sure'. After thinking about it for a bit, it seemed like such a great idea, I starting considering that it was not my own. Sure enough, a quick google search displayed that it was the idea of the one and only Oprah. So Oprah, I am borrowing your idea for the purposes of my little mommy blog.
Thursday's here at Little Elm are now - *the things I know for sure* Thanks Oprah!
The Things I Know for Sure:
*My husband looked extra hot this morning!
*Breaking Bad could not get any more intense (can't believe there are only two more episodes)
*Peekay's twinkle twinkle performance (video to follow soon) and Elm's rendition of Mr. Golden Sun just melt my heart
*I am not ready, have not trained enough and am terrified of the Zombie Run I am doing soon, but I am going to give it all I've got!
*I am perfectly content with two children and will not be having another baby but holding a newborn will always, always make me think my heart is big enough for one more (so soft and tiny and miraculous)
*That I am so loved and supported by so many (thanks for all your votes for Circle of Moms. Keep on voting!!)
I am sure some of you wonder.....why do I blog?
About a decade ago or so, I was told the sister of a young man I went to highschool with who recently killed in a car accident wrote a blog. I checked it out for curiosity sake. She was cool, from a big city and so different from me. Her links section led me to a blog that opened up a whole world to me of woman who shared stories about their lives, their struggles as working creative people writing books, photography etc..many going through fertility journeys, many already young moms.
Their stories opened up different parts of the world for me, different view points and this authentic, raw voice that so many of them shared so eloquently inspired me.
Stories are what make us human. Stories are what join us together. I love understanding other people's way of life, I am sure that is why I have travelled to remote parts of the world as well. So I was hooked and started a blog years ago, which I moved on from to another blog and then a mommy blog. I love sharing and writing about my story. It clears my head. It keeps me in tune with what I am feeilng.
So, that brings me to this contest that I hope you can help me with. Cast your vote for me! I sure would appreciate it. Click below or vote using the badge at the bottom of my site. Thank you!
Oh my sweet little girl. I didn't realize how many times it would be so hard to let you get a little further away from me before you are even four. It is your first day in kindergarten. You are three, your birthday in a few weeks. How did all those days and nights happen between when I first held your tiny body and now, a person who carries a backpack and eats lunch on her own.
We worked hard to get you ready for today, but you have been ready for so long. All the gathering of stuff, the practicing things like lids and zippers and shoes on and off was really for me. Little pieces of me gathering the strength to give you away again to the world of the unknown.
You were brave enough to talk to a few new friends today. You chatted with a little girl on the carpet and looked up at me with these eyes that said so much. They said 'look at me mom, I can do this, I'm doing it. I know you are proud'. I hope I never forget that little face and that little raise of your eyebrow. As a friend emailed me on th eve of your start, 'you know she's got this'. I do.
So you go. Into the world of being this new little person in this new world. I won't know details of what happens there except for what you or your teachers share. I have to let my little bird fly free once again. My heart is always with you and hopefully everyone in your new environment will soon know how special you are, how funny and smart and kind you always are.
I love you my snuggly, baby girl.
With my sweet girl only days away from making the big leap to grade school, I have been pretty nostalgic lately. I read my very first post on this blog (a love letter to her) out loud to her. It was an interesting experience sharing those words with her, knowing she actually understands some of it now and that some of it maybe she will never fully understand.
Anyway, here it is. A blast from the past. 2009 to be exact.
As little elm approaches 4, I am realizing how quickly her perceptions of life are being formed. I feel this nagging pressure to start cultivating our family's values more formally. In order to best support our children as they grow into the beings they will eventually become I feel my husband and I have to agree on some guiding principles. I feel I am constantly trying to find one fitting message that I can hang from our walls that from now until they come back with their grandchildren will be understood as to who we are here. Some that I have become attached to are:
Be yourself (a nice simple message that I think really encompasses everything they would need to know that whoever they become, our love is unconditional and to give strength to taking the time to know themselves)
We do hard work (something I found in some of Brene Brown's readings that has just taken on so much depth in my mind for how I want to live and think about my place in the world)
Or not as easy to put on a wall, but something I have been attached to for over a decade is a passage from a short essay from Martin Luther King Jr. "If a man is called to be a street sweeper, he should sweep streets even as Michaelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, "Here lived a street sweeper who did his job well."
Of course, the best way for them to see how we want them to live is to show them by example. Be the people we would hope they could stive toward. In her best selling book that I am working through, Daring Greatly, Brene Brown (one of tribe of woman I have come to adore over the last decade) has a whole section addressing 'Daring to be the Parent we want our Children to be'
Now that is infinitely more work on the part of a parent but such a stronger message. It makes me really reflect on what they are seeing from me and where I can do better for all of us.
In a small town in India we walked by the scene of a new house being built. This woman struck me. She carried the bricks with ease from one side of the construction site to the other. A process that here , in North America, would have been done with the use of machines, not people. That would have been done quicker and more efficiently, but here her hands would touch every inch of the work she did, it seemed. One process, mutiple ways of completing the task.
She is helping me today. Helping me to remember there are different way in which we can practice the things we do in our daily life. Some practices may make us work harder but bring us closer to what we are a part of.
I am looking to change a fews ways in which I practice my daily life. Things that I hope will bring me closer to feeling like I am in my own body and mind and not being pulled along by the rushed, automatic ways in which I have been using to move through this world.